Prologue
It's a typically wet, Cornish, autumnal afternoon. An intrepid treasure hunter (the hero of our tale) scans an industrial unit at a secret location in the Tamar Valley. It's the resting place for stuff that no-one wants anymore. In other words, the perfect hunting ground for our hero.
His eye scans the room. A smoked glass coffee table, a military history fan's collection of VHS videos, an unloved rowing machine, a crate of anonymous metal artefacts of unknown provenance, a careworn mechanical donkey with a faintly striped bottom, a 1980s 'vintage' Argos wardrobe.... hold on, a mechanical donkey with a faintly striped bottom.....
The clue is in the bottom
Introducing Jeffrey the Zebra
So the donkey was delivered back to our hero's home in Liskeard, Cornwall, where he adorned the living room for so long that he was adopted as part of the family, and was christened 'Jeffrey'.
Jeffrey dates from the late '50s/early '60s and is made of fibreglass. He was originally attached to floor-mounted machinery so that he could give gentle rides to children on
their seaside holidays. At some point in his career, perhaps when his stripes became a little shabby and tired, some bright spark decided to reinvent him as a donkey (a lot easier than repainting his stripes - 'I can understand why!' our hero exclaims). A simple coat of grey paint, and the transformation was complete.
Then about ten years ago he was retired from service,
usurped in children's affections by the likes of Postman Pat and Thomas the Tank Engine. So he made what he thought was his final journey to a local refuse tip here in Cornwall, destined
for landfill until he was spotted by a certain someone with a discerning eye...
With a huge window space at LASSCO
Ropewalk to fill, the time had clearly come for Jeffrey to be take centre stage.
The Restoration Job
After some preliminary 'zebra stripe patterning' research, and construction of the obligatory mood-board, work began on restoring Jeffrey to his former gloriously striped self. He was removed from his defunct mechanical base, and remounted onto a specially commissioned stand.
Step one: Get rid of boring old donkey grey 'overcoat'
Sanding and gentle scrubbing revealed Jeffrey's true zebra identity.
Step two: 'Stripe remap' and undercoat application
Some confusing layers of stripes meant a rethink and extensive 'stripe remapping' project. This resulted in both white and black stripes requiring several undercoat layers.
Our plucky hero wasn't phased by the challenging working conditions. Neither was Jeffrey.
Step Three: Overcoat
Suitable jet black and creamy white paints selected, Jeffrey was ready for his final furlong. A shiny fire engine red paint was chosen for his saddle.
Step Four: Stand back and admire
And so we are now at the end of Jeffrey's Journey. He is presently adorning the windows at LASSCO Ropewalk and will undoubtedly be the star at the 30th May launch of Marc Kitchen-Smith at LASSCO Ropewalk.
But how long can the great buying public resist his charms?
'Come and see me some time.'
Marc Kitchen-Smith at LASSCO Ropewalk
41 Maltby Street,
Bermondsey
London SE1 3PA
Twitter: @mkitchensmith